Self-Love: A Gateway to Global Love (Blog the Love 2013)

Posted on February 14, 2013

Welcome, dear friends, to A Mental Mystic’s first annual Valentine’s Day Blog-In! Where bloggers from all over the blogosphere, regardless of niche, gather together to spread the ideals of global love, abundance, and equality for all!

If you’re new here and not sure how this is working, you can check out the initial post I made with regard to Blog the Love. Then, write your post and link it up to us via the linky tool below. (Please make sure to link the url for your post, rather than the link to your main page.  Thank you!) Clicking on a few of the links to visit other participants… Well, that’s just good karma. *winks* And, if you happen to come across a post that you really like, make sure to let the blog owner, as well as US, know via comments.

Above all else… This is a party! A party in which we mix it up with others by visiting other blogs and commenting. Blog hopping! So, have fun with it! You may just meet your latest BBF (Blog Best Friend), but you’ll never know unless you get out there and mingle!

So… How do we spread the ideal of global love?  Well, for starters, we need to find it within ourselves.

Self-Love is really underrated.  People say that it leads to selfishness and that is NOT a good thing.  The truth of matter is… more times than not, we are so busy living our lives for others or things, that our Self gets lost in the mix.  Little time is actually spent tending to our needs, whether physical, mental, or emotional.  We’re taught that others are more important than self, and while I do agree with that to some degree, I believe we need to spend more time – than we do – focusing on ourselves, in order that we’re in a mental space where we can focus on others. We need to love ourselves first so that we are able to give others the love and attention they (and we) desire.

“Loving yourself is not an incidental undertaking.  It’s the most important job that each of us has come here to do.  It’s the one thing we really need to accomplish on behalf of the one and only person for whom we’re totally responsible.  It’s also the key to opening the door to greater love, warmth, and intimacy in all our other relationships.  Indeed, it’s only when you reside in the nourishing feeling of loving yourself that you have a clear sense of what you seek in your relationships with others, as well as what you can offer them in return.  When you know how good it feels to trust, honor, and enjoy yourself, you know that these same feelings, invested in someone else, can lift other people’s spirits and give them a sense of their own value.  In this way self-love becomes the standard of not only for what we want to receive, but also for how to become a more loving person and have deeper, richer, and more meaningful relationships.”, Daphne Kingma, When You Feel You’re Not Enough


“From the spiritual perspective, it is by turning your attention inward to yourSelf that you are able to experience your connection with Life, with God, with All That Is.

“From the human perspective, every relationship you ever have with someone else exactly mirrors one or more aspects of the relationship you have with yourself.”  ~

So, how do we do it?  How do we take the first step toward being a more loving partner to ourselves?

Kai, at, says becoming aware of your self-dialogue “is key”.   We need to become aware of and really listen to what it is we are saying to ourselves.  She gives examples of some of the less than desirable and down-right destructive things we can be heard to say to ourselves.

  • “There is something wrong with me. I’m really messed up.”“I’m bad.”
  • “It’s all my fault.”
  • “I’m incompetent. I don’t know what I’m doing.”
  • “I’m not (good, smart, attractive, rich, etc.) enough.”
  • “I should have (fill in the blank).”
  • “I’m not as (good, smart, attractive, successful, etc.) as that person.”
  • “I’ll never get that job.”
  • “I’ll never be able to do this. I don’t have what it takes.”
Often, these things are “long-held beliefs about yourself that aren’t even based on reality. They are hangovers from other people’s energy being projected onto you. This usually comes from your parents, siblings, and other people around you during your early years.”

In order to take that first step toward awareness, Kai suggests periodically checking in with yourself as you go through your day.  Ask yourself how you’re feeling.  Happy?  Alive?  Open?  Or are you closed and contracted?  Or just plain neutral?

“If you are feeling negative, trace back to when you first started feeling that way. Chances are really good that somewhere at that juncture you told yourself something negative about yourself.

“What might first come to your awareness is a negative attitude or thought about someone else. However, if you look closer you’ll find that somewhere along the way the part that really got you feeling bad was a negative thought about yourself. It might have been guilt about the negative thought about someone else, or feelings of inadequacy.”

Practicing self-care, as well as setting and maintaining personal boundaries are strong ways for us to show ourselves that we are important and that we LOVE us.

What are some ways we can practice good self-care?

Nancy Barry-Jansson, the voice behind shared these suggestions with readers:

  • Regular exercise to keep your body-temple functioning at it’s best
  • Daily meditation or quiet contemplation
  • Eating healthy sit-down meals
  • Consciously choosing supportive thoughts/beliefs (affirmations, visualizations)
  • Taking breaks for deep breathing~from your belly, not shallowly from your chest
  • Getting to sleep at a regular time, and the right amount of sleep for you to be at your best
  • Doing something fun every day~laughter is a powerful medicine
  • Counting your blessings (on paper or in your mind) often and regularly

No matter what occurs in our world, the one and only person we are guaranteed to have to love until our very last breath is our self.  Until we birth and nurture a relationship with that person, we cannot do so (at least not effectively) with another.  So, does it not stand to reason that, if global love is ever to become a reality, we’ll have to start with the one closest to us?  Our self?

So, on this Valentine’s Day, I urge you to go out and – in addition to all the others to whom you will show love today – show just as much, if not more to YOU!  You are SO worth it!

All my love to you all!  And thank you SO MUCH for joining me here today!

Until next time…


Posted in: A Mental Mystic