I am a fiercely independent individual.
Perhaps, it has something to do with my nature. I am an Aries, after all. Or maybe it is given that, as a child, I was an only child or even a latch-key kid in the early years of my life. It might even be due to the fact that, as a military spouse, I’ve had to be.
Whatever the reason, somewhere along the way, I adopted the belief that it’s just easier if I take care of things myself, rather than asking for help. After all, asking help from others leaves one in a vulnerable position, does it not?
I am a staunch believer these days that there are lessons that we, as souls, planned for ourselves prior to incarnating into this physical existence of ours, things we wished to focus on and “get right this time around” and that we are given as many opportunities to learn the lesson as it takes – all in progressive degrees of intensity. Depending on how “dense” we can be… the lessons will eventually – sometimes – come to us in the form of a Universal “clue by four” (a term shared with me by one of my dearest sisters many years back).
A “clue by four” is something of an energetic two-by-four, which – if we don’t “get” something after several attempts – the Universe seems to utilize. Something which rocks our world.
Last night felt like a clue-by-four to me…
My Jeep broke down as my girls and I were on our way home from our weekly meeting with our UU Fellowship. Were my husband with us, I would have depended upon him to “fix” the situation.
Over the years, a great deal of trust has developed between us, as I believe ought to be the case in a committed relationship, so I am able to allow myself the vulnerability of relying upon him. Beyond him, though… I am extremely hesitant to ask for help. I know little to nothing about fixing vehicles, however. I needed to reach out – no matter how uncomfortable – to someone. That someone(s) happened to be my son and his roommate, as well as his roommate’s family.
It was an uncomfortable position. Between the initial situation with the vehicle and having to ask for help… I felt as though my jugular was bared, and the situation isn’t even completely resolved yet. I did realize the intended lesson this morning, though…
It is a process through which I am going. Emerging from my chrysalis as a independent “loner”, I am learning how to be a member of a greater community.
Oh, for certain… I’ve got the helping part down pat. As what could be called a “recovering co-dependent”, I’m really good at being there to help others. With the shoe on the other foot, though… Allowing others to help and be of “service” to me… Yes, I’m not so good at that part. Yet.
Edit: As this situation progresses… I’m convinced that this is a “lesson” for my son as well. He is taking the bull by the horns and working to fix it for me. I see so much of his dad in him as he does so. I believe this to be a moment for a boost in confidence for him; a moment in which he is being allowed to prove to himself, more than anyone, that he can do whatever he sets his mind to. He is proving himself to be quite a young man, even more so than in the past. My pride in him, quite literally, brings tears to my eyes.
This morning, I was honored to find a comment from Bebe Butler on my “About Me” page. She included me in her list of nominees for the Beautiful Blogger Award. (Thank you, Bebe!)
In order to accept this award, I need to “create a post where you list 7 things about yourself and nominate 15 other bloggers for the ‘Beautiful Blogger Award’.”
Now, while I have spent a couple of years, already, in the blogosphere… my current “niche” is really still quite new to me. This does not mean, though, that I do not have anyone in mind to nominate. I have, after all, met quite a few beautiful souls already in the short span of time I’ve been mingling. I will do my best to fill out the “required” list of 15 nominees. If I nominate your blog, I only ask the same of you – to nominate as many (or 15) as you are able because I do like Bebe’s take on the sharing of this award (as well as others)…
“This award is more like a cyber style warm fuzzy… you pass it along as a thank you to the blogs that have inspired you and moved you.”
It is like giving a cyber hug to those you wish you were able to hug in person. With that in mind, here are my nominees…
Ashtoreth Eldritch @ Notes from the Underground
Lisa @ On A Solid Rock
Alania @ WeBelieveInLight
Moon @ I AM
“Alootka” @ Alootka
Lisa Gawlas @ The Shift of Time and Energy
Hazel Wind Harker @ The [Ex-] Witch Next Door
Cameron @ Growing Grace Farm
Now, if you’re reading this and have not been nominated, even though I still have quite a few nominations left, please do not take it as a personal affront, rather know that I do love everyone that I am coming in contact with through Mental Mystic. I am still in the process of getting to know and better connecting with all of you. For me… that has become the greatest part about this journey for me – the connections consciously being made.
On to the next part…
7 Things About Me
1) Ever since I was able to form words into a sentence, I’ve loved to write.
2) It was the work I was doing on a piece of fiction that ended up consciously setting upon my spiritual journey. One of my characters learned “the Old Ways” from her grandmother, something I had absolutely no clue about, but something that had come to me in a moment of inspiration. It was through the research I did about them that an entire new world was opened to me.
3) My family, as well as those I consider to be ‘family’, mean everything to me.
4) I am an extremely creative being. Unless I get my creative time in on a regular basis, I become rather loopy and completely ungrounded. This is something that I’ve only recently discovered about myself, however.
5) It is a dream my husband and I share to establish our own homestead, complete with chickens, goats, and a donkey named after my husband’s brother. The donkey is a part of the dream exclusive to my husband,though. I deny all accountability for that part. But, this is a dream we plan to manifest within the next few years, and don’t worry… I’ll be certain to share the progress we make with all of you.
6) I am – despite what seems to be a bunch of potholes and setbacks – enjoying my transition from suburban dweller to “country girl”. I am delighting in the change of seasons. Fall is one of my absolutely favorite times of year, even though – given the multitude of oaks in our front yard – there a multitude of leaves to be raked up in the near future.
7) I am an utter and complete sucker when it comes to my furbabies. Since moving here two and a half months ago, I have opened our family door to one stray cat, one shelter puppy, one stray kitten, and one shelter kitten, although – in my defense – the stray kitten did end up moving out with my son. Our shelter puppy looked up at me with sorrowful eyes, as the other puppies – excited for the attention of new people – trampled her. Envision the eyes of Puss n Boots from Shrek. They seemed to say, “give me a home. Love me.” I simply couldn’t say “no”.
So, there you go. A rather lengthy post, but… Thank you for hanging out with me until the end!
Much Love to You ALL,
~D
Spiritual World Traveler
October 31, 2012
Thanks for the cyberhug! xoxoxo Thank you for the follow and thank you for the award! I look forward to catching up on yours!
jenjoinwyo
October 18, 2012
Thank you, so very much, Dawna! May you be blessed, now and always!
Dawna
October 19, 2012
You are MOST welcome, dear lady. Hope you have a wonderful weekend! And, thank YOU!
Ashtoreth Eldritch
October 18, 2012
*HUGS* Thank you for the warm fuzzy hug. I will be replying more in-depth after the next teaching session — just 3 more hours and a long weekend awaits! — or tomorrow, after a night of sleep and a mug of coffee have worked their magic upon me *Grin* I just couldn’t go without saying “Thank you!” and —
You are such a beautiful woman, heart and soul, and it was one of the biggest Blessings in my life to have found you and be able to count you as Family of my Heart! ALL of my LOVE to you and yours, and HUGE SQUEEZY HUGS!
Dawna
October 19, 2012
OH! You are always most welcome, my dearest sister. Steadily working on the coffee on this end as well. Eesh! Mentally feeling like a chicken with its head cut off this morning… lol
Thank you SO MUCH for your immensely kind words. You have been such a blessing to me and my life as well. I cannot thank the Universe enough for having our paths cross, sister of my heart and soul. Send ALL my LOVE and many, MANY hugs to you and yours! Have a fabulous weekend!
Alania
October 18, 2012
Dawna…i just fully read your experience…and i’m laughing because i FULLY understand you!!! I’m also a strong-willed aries…who, very early on, embraced the mis-guided words “If you want something done right…do it yourself!!” And after years of seeking to shift that un-truth….i STILL battle with it in great ways!! So…i get you. 🙂 .BUT…i have also discovered great JOY ~ FREEDOM and LOVE by learning to trust others!! So…keep on trusting…it’s all quite worth it!!!
Dawna
October 19, 2012
Oh, my, Alania! I know there is a reason for every individual which enters our lives, but I believe we have just found the reason for our paths crossing! 🙂
Oh, yes! That is it exactly! So much more “simple” to do it yourself the first time, rather than having to go back through, after someone else has done it, and re-do/fix it. That’s what I always thought. That is until I began to let go of perfection and allowing others to be of assistance/service to me. 🙂
Thank you, dear soul/sister for your comments! It is always so nice when one discovers that one is understood and there are those who are able to relate.
Alania
October 18, 2012
You are fabulous…and you’re INSPIRING!! Your passionate outlook on life will open every door….and welcome every Blessing!!! Keep BEing your beautiful self…and watch the world transform before you!!! THANK YOU FOR BEING YOU!!
Dawna
October 19, 2012
Awww… Again, thank you so much for your words. They have touched me deeply and brought such a smile to my face when I first read them and continue to do so. Have a FABULOUS day and weekend, dear sister!
amoonfull
October 18, 2012
Thank you for sharing those beautiful details about you and for this cyber ‘hug’! 🙂
Dawna
October 19, 2012
And, as always, thank you so much for dropping in! Your presence is always welcome here, dear soul.